One of my favorite commercials is by an insurance company - AllState I think; it shows someone doing a kind act for someone else and it forms a chain reaction eventually getting back to the person that started it in the first place. It goes to show how one simple act of kindness can have an impact on someone. I recently became a fan of the show The Secret Millionaire in which a millionaire goes undercover and gives away money to people making a difference in their communities. This past week's millionaire (there's a different one every week) was working with a man who when he was younger got a girl pregnant and got kicked out of his house. Knowing his own struggle he decided to help others by collecting donated clothes, shoes, etc and with monetary gifts he bought toiletries and formed hygiene kits. He'd gather all this stuff up and go into one of the worst homeless areas and give the stuff away. While they were there, they saw an old man with a walker whose shoes had been covered in feces - courtesy of someone else, but there were no more shoes. The guy who ran the drive asked what size shoe, then looked at his own took off his shoes and gave them to the old man who was stunned and grateful. As I sat there watching, it brought a tear to my eye - I had never seen such a selfless act. Now I'm not saying take off your shoes and go give them to the nearest homeless person, but just think about the differences you CAN make. Recently my brother's been going through some things and HATES to cook so a couple of times I've brought dinner with all the trimmings. He was so grateful, but I just figured that he could use it, and well for those of you that know me know I LOVE to cook and bake. Some might call me an enabler lol but the joy I get from watching someone's face light up when I hand them something I made for them is priceless because more often than not they'll tell me they were having a bad day and needed a pick me up; to know that someone was thinking about them with love.
You see it's a win/win situation; not only is the person that is the recipient of the kind act grateful, but something inside you happens when you're kind to others. For lack of a better term - you get warm fuzzies. We all have our own struggles; that goes without saying but every once in awhile we have to look beyond ourselves and realize that there's a bigger picture. You never know when smiling at someone or opening the door for someone will start that chain reaction and guess what? Eventually it'll get back to YOU!
We've all heard the term you are what you eat (In my case I'd probably be a plate of Mexican food); the same can be said for our lives. You get back what you put out there; if you're constantly being selfish or negative - guess what only selfish and negative things are gonna happen. However if you take the time to think about someone else - even for a few minutes it can make a difference. Am I saying that if you're nicer to people or more postive about things that you will all of a sudden become Cindy Crawford or have Bill Gates' money? NO but you might get something you never expected - kindness in return.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Being Me
Alot of us sit and dream of what it would be like to be someone else. Whether it be someone famous or our nextdoor neighbor; we all do it. Personally I wouldn't mind being Paula Deen; for those of you that don't know her she's a lovely southern woman who has a show on the FoodNetwork. I like her because she overcame a lot; she lost her parents at a young age, raised two boys on her own, started a business from nothing, and dealt with agoraphobia (fear of the public). She's a success story if I've ever heard one and I have a lot of respect for her.
That being said, though I would often like to be her (who wouldn't want a successful show and the love of thousands?) I am me; for better or for worse. I'm a mother, daughter, sister, friend - I carry all these titles. However the most important title I carry is Karyn because without her I couldn't be any of those other things. Now this may sound a little crazy, but allow me to explain a little revelation I had after my break up with my ex.
It was probably about a month or so after I had left my son's father and I was in the kitchen making a salad. As I cut the tomato I had an epiphany; this was the first tomato I'd eaten in sometime. Why? It wasn't that I didn't like them - I LOVE them, but because my ex didn't like them I'd taken to not buying them at the store. I had given up something I loved all because I was trying to please someone else. Now this may seem insignificant to some, but for me it was eye opening. It made me look back over the last few years and realize how much of myself I'd lost. I watched what he wanted to watch, went to whatever movies he wanted, and the list went on and on. I decided then and there that I would never again give up something so precious: ME.
For the most part I have been successful with keeping that promise. However when you start to take care of others you do lose yourself to a certain degree. I would never change taking care of my son or my mom for anything, but with the problems they have it can be draining. I know many of you know this feeling; but what I've come to realize is that in order to take care of them I have to be the best me I can be. So over the last 6 months I've taken to getting MYSELF to the Dr., the Dentist, and recently I've started my journey of becoming healthier by losing weight. I try to no longer care what others think of me and I tell people if you don't want an honest answer don't ask me.
So what am I trying to say with all of this? Remember who you are and embrace that person. Love everything about her; if there's something you wish were different - change it. Don't be afraid to be who you are. If it's blue hair and black nailpolish than wear it like nobody's business - give a smile and a wave to those who stare. If you want to run a marathon, get some running shoes and run a marathon. Don't let others push you into being someone you're not because it'll never make you happy. Eat all the tomatoes you want (I know I will!) and BE YOURSELF - noone can do it better!
That being said, though I would often like to be her (who wouldn't want a successful show and the love of thousands?) I am me; for better or for worse. I'm a mother, daughter, sister, friend - I carry all these titles. However the most important title I carry is Karyn because without her I couldn't be any of those other things. Now this may sound a little crazy, but allow me to explain a little revelation I had after my break up with my ex.
It was probably about a month or so after I had left my son's father and I was in the kitchen making a salad. As I cut the tomato I had an epiphany; this was the first tomato I'd eaten in sometime. Why? It wasn't that I didn't like them - I LOVE them, but because my ex didn't like them I'd taken to not buying them at the store. I had given up something I loved all because I was trying to please someone else. Now this may seem insignificant to some, but for me it was eye opening. It made me look back over the last few years and realize how much of myself I'd lost. I watched what he wanted to watch, went to whatever movies he wanted, and the list went on and on. I decided then and there that I would never again give up something so precious: ME.
For the most part I have been successful with keeping that promise. However when you start to take care of others you do lose yourself to a certain degree. I would never change taking care of my son or my mom for anything, but with the problems they have it can be draining. I know many of you know this feeling; but what I've come to realize is that in order to take care of them I have to be the best me I can be. So over the last 6 months I've taken to getting MYSELF to the Dr., the Dentist, and recently I've started my journey of becoming healthier by losing weight. I try to no longer care what others think of me and I tell people if you don't want an honest answer don't ask me.
So what am I trying to say with all of this? Remember who you are and embrace that person. Love everything about her; if there's something you wish were different - change it. Don't be afraid to be who you are. If it's blue hair and black nailpolish than wear it like nobody's business - give a smile and a wave to those who stare. If you want to run a marathon, get some running shoes and run a marathon. Don't let others push you into being someone you're not because it'll never make you happy. Eat all the tomatoes you want (I know I will!) and BE YOURSELF - noone can do it better!
Monday, March 28, 2011
Getting here
How did I get here? It's amazing the roads one travels to get anywhere; for me it's been a rocky one filled with potholes and the like. With each pothole though comes a story; some good, some bad, and some that I'd really wish I would have avoided. However it's made me the woman I am today and I've grown kind of fond her.
My story is a fairly simple one. I was one of five children and I had a great upbringing - sure there's skeletons, but who doesn't have them? It's all in how you disguise them and how far back you push them in the closet so they don't all come bursting out at the same time. The one thing I've always struggled with though is self esteem. I've always worried too much what others think of me; it wasn't til I became a mom that I was like who gives a crap? Those of you that are parents know that becoming responsible for another human being changes you. All of a sudden you can lift cars, run marathons, walk through fire, and tell off people you never would have thought you could all in the name of your child. Multiply that by about a thousand when you have a child with a disability. I have a son with ADHD, ODD, and some Anxiety Disorder; this in itself is a challenge, but a challenge that I feel blessed to have because I think God (or whoever you believe in) decided that I was strong enough to handle it.
I've scoured the net and other networks for support, etc but never found any place that I "belonged". The only person that got that feeling - that I know of was a close friend who also has a child with a disability. And it wasn't just support for this, it was for many aspects of our lives, weight loss, stress management, etc. For awhile we've been relying on each other - texts, emails, IMs, you name it we did it. All to support each other - both in our successes and our failures. It became clear to both of us that there were probably others out there that felt like us. So I've started this blog, and she's currently doing hers - once I get used to this thing I'll have a link - she's really pretty inspiring and pretty damn awesome. She made me realize that I need to "own it" to quote her; to use my own words to realize that we're all the masters of our own destiny - you make life what it is - good or bad. Sure there's going to be those proverbial potholes, but without the potholes one can never appreciate the smooth parts of the road.
So my friends this is part of the road that got me here; if you're still reading I hope you'll join me on the rest of this journey.
My story is a fairly simple one. I was one of five children and I had a great upbringing - sure there's skeletons, but who doesn't have them? It's all in how you disguise them and how far back you push them in the closet so they don't all come bursting out at the same time. The one thing I've always struggled with though is self esteem. I've always worried too much what others think of me; it wasn't til I became a mom that I was like who gives a crap? Those of you that are parents know that becoming responsible for another human being changes you. All of a sudden you can lift cars, run marathons, walk through fire, and tell off people you never would have thought you could all in the name of your child. Multiply that by about a thousand when you have a child with a disability. I have a son with ADHD, ODD, and some Anxiety Disorder; this in itself is a challenge, but a challenge that I feel blessed to have because I think God (or whoever you believe in) decided that I was strong enough to handle it.
I've scoured the net and other networks for support, etc but never found any place that I "belonged". The only person that got that feeling - that I know of was a close friend who also has a child with a disability. And it wasn't just support for this, it was for many aspects of our lives, weight loss, stress management, etc. For awhile we've been relying on each other - texts, emails, IMs, you name it we did it. All to support each other - both in our successes and our failures. It became clear to both of us that there were probably others out there that felt like us. So I've started this blog, and she's currently doing hers - once I get used to this thing I'll have a link - she's really pretty inspiring and pretty damn awesome. She made me realize that I need to "own it" to quote her; to use my own words to realize that we're all the masters of our own destiny - you make life what it is - good or bad. Sure there's going to be those proverbial potholes, but without the potholes one can never appreciate the smooth parts of the road.
So my friends this is part of the road that got me here; if you're still reading I hope you'll join me on the rest of this journey.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)