Getting here

How did I get here? It's amazing the roads one travels to get anywhere; for me it's been a rocky one filled with potholes and the like. With each pothole though comes a story; some good, some bad, and some that I'd really wish I would have avoided. However it's made me the woman I am today and I've grown kind of fond her.

My story is a fairly simple one. I was one of five children and I had a great upbringing - sure there's skeletons, but who doesn't have them? It's all in how you disguise them and how far back you push them in the closet so they don't all come bursting out at the same time. The one thing I've always struggled with though is self esteem. I've always worried too much what others think of me; it wasn't til I became a mom that I was like who gives a crap? Those of you that are parents know that becoming responsible for another human being changes you. All of a sudden you can lift cars, run marathons, walk through fire, and tell off people you never would have thought you could all in the name of your child. Multiply that by about a thousand when you have a child with a disability. I have a son with ADHD, ODD, and some Anxiety Disorder; this in itself is a challenge, but a challenge that I feel blessed to have because I think God (or whoever you believe in) decided that I was strong enough to handle it.

I've scoured the net and other networks for support, etc but never found any place that I "belonged". The only person that got that feeling - that I know of was a close friend who also has a child with a disability. And it wasn't just support for this, it was for many aspects of our lives, weight loss, stress management, etc. For awhile we've been relying on each other - texts, emails, IMs, you name it we did it. All to support each other - both in our successes and our failures. It became clear to both of us that there were probably others out there that felt like us. So I've started this blog, and she's currently doing hers - once I get used to this thing I'll have a link - she's really pretty inspiring and pretty damn awesome. She made me realize that I need to "own it" to quote her; to use my own words to realize that we're all the masters of our own destiny - you make life what it is - good or bad. Sure there's going to be those proverbial potholes, but without the potholes one can never appreciate the smooth parts of the road.

So my friends this is part of the road that got me here; if you're still reading I hope you'll join me on the rest of this journey.